How to deal with holiday blues of being single
The holidays have this weird habit of making everyone think we should all be in this lovey-dovey relationship mode, right? Rom-coms, those cheesy commercials—suddenly, it feels like being solo during this time is some sort of a glitch in the festive matrix. And let’s not even talk about the “Are you seeing anyone special?” questions at family gatherings. But hey, if you’re not rocking the “relationship” status this holiday season, it’s all good! Here’s the lowdown on how to handle it.
Wanting a cozy relationship during the holidays isn’t weak. Most people naturally dig the whole love-and-belonging vibe. So, feeling that twinge of wanting someone to snuggle up with isn’t out of place or even desperate. Honestly, it is as normal as it can get.
Okay, we’ve heard all that “love your single life” advice, right? But honestly, there are times when that pep talk just doesn’t cut it. Like, who loves being the only solo face in the yearly “ugly sweater” pic? So yeah, it’s cool to admit that sometimes flying solo isn’t a total blast. And that's okay!
Also, here’s the deal with family gatherings. You know those moments when relatives bring up your relationship status? Ugh. But guess what? Your idea of a chill life might not be the same as theirs, and that’s fine. Their well-meaning advice might not match your vibe, and that’s totally okay too. Your happiness? That’s your thing to define.
When the family's throwing the whole "when will you settle down?" game at you, it’s totally okay to dodge it like a pro. Shift the convo to your wins this year that have nothing to do with relationships. Your big work win, acing a personal goal, or just cruising through a rough patch—bring those up to create a benchmark for yourself. The rest? It’s better to hear it and not pay too much attention or take it to heart. Coz when the holiday season is over, there will be none pestering you about getting a partner or asking about marriage in general.
True support during single-during-the-holidays times are the friendships around. Instead of waiting for folks to hit you up, why not make the first move? Sometimes, it’s better to ask for what you need. If you’re feeling like you’re oversharing or bugging your pals, don’t sweat it. Your brain might just be playing tricks on you.
But again, your friends might be sharing their holidays with their families, leaving you alone. When things try to bring you down, don’t panic or do into a sad state. Instead, distract your mind and indulge in the spirit of giving back during the holiday season. Volunteering at a local shelter to start with. There are animals who need as much, if not more, love than yourself.
Also, don’t rush to fill the gap just because. Take it slow, especially if you're fresh out of a relationship. Embrace being unattached for a bit. If you feel the urge to hit up an old flame to soothe the brunt of a solo holiday, know that it might be helpfulint he l=short run but offer more complexities. That being said, if staying unattached and smart about it, retracing steps with an old flame (if they are solo too) might just be the right way to spend the holidays.
Also, cut yourself some slack. Don't get lured into trying to force things just because you're itching for a relationship. Instead, focus on the good bits of solo life. And as for the holidays, keep your expectations real. It's easy to get swept up in visions of a picture-perfect celebration, but sometimes, simple is better. Find the small joys and build on those. If you are finisng yourself at home, away from family and friends, you can indulge in things too. Hit up the expensive food you wanted to try for so long, Learn to perfect few dishes. Get a makeover of the house. It doesn’t have to burn a hole in the pocket (or it can) but as long as it gives you happiness.
Alternatively, consider reaching out to others who might be flying solo too. Create your own little holiday gang—a found family of sorts. It's a chance to adopt each other for the season and create new traditions together. Many cities offer exclusive events for people who stay away from families and bring them together for events. Look it up. That can be a great way to spend holidays with random stranger who might end up being close friends later.
