How To Keep Up With A High-Maintenance Buddy: Tips To Handle Their Fuss
While it is true that you cannot change an individual’s personality, you can learn to tackle them the right way to make the situation less dysfunctional.
A high-maintenance buddy demands plenty of attention, and they always have something dramatic going on in their life. Unfortunately, you often get dragged into their problems. They might involve you through long phone calls or sudden visits that may seem draining and even overwhelming to you. But how should you deal with them without telling them they are burdening you? Here are some clever ways to deal with your high-maintenance pal.
Establish boundaries
You can refuse to entertain them by saying “No” lovingly yet succinctly to establish your emotional freedom. For instance, you may speak to them like, “I love you, and I enjoy hanging out with you, but I want to go shopping alone this time. We will catch up some other time.”
When establishing boundaries, expect little drama
High-maintenance individuals do not often hear "No" from anyone. Many people avoid going against them to avoid getting involved in dramatic conflict. They simply ignore high-maintenance people instead of confronting them. So if you wish to be honest and transparent with them, they will cause drama, and you should be prepared for it.
Schedule meetups proactively
If you arrange a get-together, your high-maintenance mate's anxiety will be eased. Many high-maintenance individuals often suffer from underlying abandonment issues that are created by their constant need for others.
Nurture the bond on your terms
Try to make yourself available to your high-maintenance buddy on your terms, especially if they like to have your attention more than you like. Do not respond to their phone calls if they are continually calling you during your office meeting, vacation, or a date. Do not respond until you get home and are prepared to hear them rant.
Rehearse before you communicate with them
Practice runs can be useful. Rehearse your dialogues with another friend before communicating with your high-maintenance buddy, to eliminate distractions at the moment. Ask your practice mate to say all the demanding and draining things you expect your high-maintenance buddy to say and rehearse clear and kind responses.
Pay attention to your personal needs
High-maintenance individuals induce high levels of stress in others. If you are closely associated with this person or meet them often, it is particularly important to practice decompressing everyday.
