Four steps to help you respond in a relationship
From pausing to reflect to proceeding with the response, here are the steps to respond mindfully.
There is a lot of difference between the way we react and the way we choose to respond. Every relationship has its share of ups and downs, and difficult times. When we are faced with triggers, we often react to it instantly by rolling out eyes, or saying something that we may regret later. However, when we take our time to respond to the situation mindfully and try to seek the real reason behind it, we become better individuals who are capable of creating a healthier space in their relationship. “Responding is different than reacting because it requires you to emotionally regulate yourself,” wrote Psychotherapist Sadaf Siddiqi as she explained the difference between reacting and responding.
“You need to first regulate your own internal emotional processes. This allows you to act thoughtfully, with intention,” the expert added. Sadaf further noted down four steps by which a person can respond mindfully in a relationship without making it a space that is unhealthy for themselves and for their partner. Take a look:
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Pause: It takes six seconds to activate the parasympathetic nervous system which helps us to calm down when we are triggered. Hence, when we start to feel overwhelmed, we should take a pause for six seconds and then respond to it.
Process: Sometimes the biggest part of the trigger is to process it internally. We need to process the emotions that we are facing and check in with ourselves and have an awareness about what we are going through.
Plan: When we pause to plan, it helps the emotional part of the brain to collaborate with the logical part of the brain. We can pause and reflect on how to react and what the consequences will be of the same.
Proceed: Reacting on impulse will create guilt and regret later. Instead, we should be thoughtful on how to respond and proceed accordingly.
Disclaimer: This Article is auto-generated from the HT news service